Dishing with the Kitchen Virgin

"She''s like a modern-day, southern-fried Erma Bombeck or Dave Barry." --Booklist
Is the brand sticker still affixed to your sauté pan?
Is your wok used solely as a receptacle for potato chips?
Does your blender only see the light of day when Baccardi or Tequila is involved?
If so, then welcome to the Kitchen Virgin Club. But don''t despair--you''re in the illustrious company of Susan Reinhardt: synd...